Ayumu_Kasuga's Xanga

Well...

Sat, 27 Jan 2007 04:23:42 GMT

Since no one comments anymore I'm just going to stop using my site. I'll only use it to randomly comment on other people's when I feel like it. I hardly come on now anyways. On & off I guess. Oh well, bye byez everybody~

OMG Today was SO fun

Tue, 09 Jan 2007 23:53:09 GMT

Today in Gym we played basketball (again) but this time it was so much fun =D The teams I played against were fairly aggressive and it was fun to be aggressive as well ^_^ I fought the ball away from people a great number of times and just fought for the ball but didn't necessarily get it from them even more. The first game we played, my team was murdered but we had the most fun. The second game we played, I think it ended up being a tie but it wasn't the same amount of activity and aggression and I couldn't get into it as much as with the first game. Aside from all of that, mid terms are next week o_o They seem like they'll be fairly easy but you never know. Veering away completely from school, I've gone shopping three times in two weeks. I had gotten about $130 for Christmas and now all of that's gone..so I asked my grandma if I could borrow $30 not thinking about how I'm going to pay her back, when I realized that my dad technically owes me money anyway so I'm gonna make him give me $100. I don't have to pay him back anything, so I'll be officially debt free after I get the money from him. I have to shake the habit of borrowing money from people right now, otherwise I'll keep doing it even through adulthood, and once I'm independent there are more consequences for not paying people back depending on who it is I'm borrowing from. Well, I got some nice stuff & now I have 2 coupons to G+G for $15 off of any purchase of $30 or higher. I plan to use one of them this Friday after I re-accumulate my funds. Oh yeah, didn't tell you that I borrowed $15 from Cheyenne because my mom made me leave my $30 at home since I wasn't even supposed to be going shopping today, but I got a pair of jeans because I needed them desperately o.o Oh well, I don't remember what I was going to talk about next but I feel like it's important. Oh well, if I remember then I'll post it ^_^

Making my way

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 19:09:32 GMT

Well it's not the best I've done but for now it's better than nothing I think >_> I know the text is probably hard to read but I don't feel like going through and synching them all like I normally do when I change my layout. I only wish the backround pic wasn't so small that it had to repeat like that. I'm still working on it, but all things considered I think that went pretty quickly ^_^ Alright, I'm done for now but if I decide to make any changes I guess I'll post something about it otherwise you'll be wondering what this post has to do with anything. It won't make sense if I find some nicer pics to use. Okay then, ttyl.

This sucks

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 18:55:47 GMT

The picture I had in the backround has disappeared because the friggin' website I got it from was shut down for some reason. Sometimes I hate being so dependent on technology. So now that it has been thrust upon me in a matter most troubling, I'll have to change my layout...I can't think of anything right now and I don't have any inspiration from my personal pics (they were disposed of when my mom & dad did that mass deletion on the computer). So I'll keep an eye out for some pics because that white backround is starting to piss me off...Just thought I should let you know what's going on ^_^

Friday, December 08, 2006

Fri, 08 Dec 2006 00:07:07 GMT

Well, like I said last time...life kinda sucks and it sucks even more now >_< There have been a few developments in that last story and I'm going to make it short this time...I was still sneaking around talking to Noah on the computer and my mom found out, told me that she was kicking me out because I lied and she doesn't tolerate liars in her house...she calls Noah and tells him she's putting me on a bus to Ohio and that I couldn't live with her anymore...he's excited and she tells me to pack my bags, I do and she takes me to the bus station only to come back saying that she's only getting me because my grandma wants to see me, I get home, Noah's mom calls, my mom curses her out and does some "I told you so"-ing before sending me upstairs to think about what I've risked by insisting on talking to him even after she told me not to, she takes my cell phone and iPod, deletes my profile from the computer, my dad puts restrictions on what I can do from my new profile, my mom puts a password on it, deletes iTunes form the computer (I don't think I'll be getting my iPod back...), she forgets to delete Windows Messenger even though she deletes MSN Messenger, I start talking to Noah again on the computer and here I am today...I think I got everything in there...I didn't feel like forming full sentences, sorry. I guess you get the 'gist of what happened. I'm really tired right now so I don't feel like adding much more. By the way, I got my phone back already >_< this happened about a week ago. No, exactly a week ago. I talk to the other guy via email and I feel absolutely no remorse. Don't think my mom's crazy, she did the right thing in this case. The only problem is that she let it happen again; every time I get punished it's never permanent and if it is I find a way around it and life goes on. Everything goes back to normal and we don't even talk about it anymore. It's a shame that I knew she wasn't going to leave me there so I didn't freak out or anything. I faked like I was crying to make it seem like I cared and that it was effective but honestly I didn't care at all. If anything I think I was kinda happy..? I couldn't really tell, but I sure as hell wasn't sad or sorry that I did what I did. And so another entry ends. When something interesting happens that I feel like talking about I'll post it. Actually something did happen but I'm not sure if the people involved would like me to talk about it. Oh well, I'll post it some other time and I'll use a fake name for the person that's not me >_<

Friday, November 17, 2006

Fri, 17 Nov 2006 19:16:15 GMT

Um...okay, how do I start this? Nevermind, looks like I already have. Well, I have a problem that has forced me to plunge into the early stages of depression. Greatfully I'm still concious enough to prevent everyone from knowing by supressing it. My mom won't let me talk to Noah anymore (or anyone else I have met on-line) because she doesn't approve of those methods of making friends and thinks that I'm just going to wind up getting kidnapped because of it. LIES! It's not gonna happen considering the fact that he lives in Ohio, and Rayne (the other guy I met) lives in Texas, and that I have irrefutable proof of that, AND that they don't know where I live in Philly, I'm not telling them until I'm older, and that I also have irrefutable proof that they are both the age they say they are and live with parental figures over the age of 30. Rayne lives with his friggin' grandparents! I talked to them, and his brother! I talked to Noah's mom! She thinks I'm a psycho bitch because I woke her up calling one time. Now to track back to the night that this is the result of...my mom is all pissed 'cause I told her Noah used to go to school with her and I didn't just tell her I met him on-line and that supposedly she would just talk to him and his mom and make sure that they're both stable(another lie, she knows she wouldn't react that way-she just wanted to make me feel bad about not just telling her). So I'm crying becasuse I'm thinking there's no way I'll ever be able to talk to them again and they start calling and she has to be the one to tell them that I can't ever talk to them again and that she doesn't want them calling anymore and I'm crying more hoping that it's all a dream so I run downstairs and just lay on the sofa face down crying and hating everything that's happening and start thinking of a way to fix this and all I can keep thinking of telling her is "I don't care if I'm never able to talk to Rayne again, just let me talk to Noah, for the love of god just let me keep talking to him if no one else, I don't care but you can't cut me off from him." But I knew that wouldn't work and I'd just get some lecture or something like I already got.(This post is incomplete, I'll finish it later-I'm not supposed to be online & my mom just came home)

Sigh...

Sun, 29 Oct 2006 23:27:51 GMT

I'm suffering from withdrawal...you may be thinking "Oh, from anime..." but no. I need my drug. I think I have a Noah dependency now. If I don't talk to him for a while I feel slightly depressed...The really sad part about that is that you usually only think of people as drugs if you're obsessed. I think I am obsessed though...oh well. It doesn't matter. I just have no idea where my drug is...or what/who it's doing. I never know. That's the scary part. I trust my drug...but there's always the shred of doubt since I can't always see it.

Well...

Sat, 28 Oct 2006 16:29:40 GMT

I didn't go to the dance because my mom told me to clean my room, and when you share a room with a six year old little menace it makes your life a little difficult...By the time I was done I could have made it about halfway through, but I was so tired...If only you could have seen all of the crap that was under my little sisters' bed...oh well, from what I hear it wasn't all that great anyway. My only regret is that I wasn't there to help Windy when she sprained her ankle somehow. And guess what? I have even more bad news. I think my dad heard me smexing (yes I meant to spell it that way) with Noah. Oh, maybe you guys didn't know I do that but yeah. It's fun and he likes it (well, so do I) so we do it. Maybe this is confusing some of you so I'll clear things up a bit...Noah lives in Ohio. I met him online & we've developed a "very close" long-distance relationship. Wait...didn't I say something about this before? Oh well, then I'm reminding you. Yeah...so last night around 11 something we were smexing, but I didn't worry about it too much because my door was closed (to help lock the heat in the room). But I thought I heard someone say "hey, Aja" (someone other than Noah) then it sounded like they went back down the steps or something. I can never tell when he's coming up the steps anyway and since I had the door closed it was really hard to tell. So I'm hoping he couldn't tell I was on the phone and he won't even ask me about it...I won't have to worry about it at all soon...he's moving out. That's a story for another day unless I've told you that one already. I can never remember...

Ummmm...Halloween dance?

Thu, 26 Oct 2006 16:40:04 GMT

I hate the fact that I'm not even going to dance there. I'm just going to stand around with Annie and Windy & Angel. I'm gonna look so stupid because I'll be wearing a chipao and they'll actually look right in whatever they're going to wear...well, Annie will to my knowlege because she's gonna be a Japanese person...so yeah...my mom told me I should go just because it's a social event. I said whatever because I don't care...I told her it's gonna be a waste of her money because it's not like I'm gonna put my ticket to good use. Really I'm only going because I don'y wanna be one of the few people that aren't going to go...plus I'm going to Soph Hop (what does that have to do with anything?). I don't even wanna go with Memphis anymore since we're more like brother & sister. Really I just don't wanna go at all...So yeah...I've been blabbing a lot...I have stuff to do so see ya ^_^

O-tay!

Sun, 08 Oct 2006 13:11:49 GMT

O-tay ppls, now that the stupid & crazy is gone...hallo~! I haven't updated in a while for reasons unknown. So, do you remember that guy Memphis? Well Cheyenne was talking to him (why the hell am i still talking to her? Nevermind...I know why :D) and he told her that he likes all of these people and how he can tell who people like just by looking at them...so Cheyenne asked him why he couldn't tell last year that I liked him and he said he didn't know. And she said that he has a problem, that he likes too many girls at one time. So, I wasn't supposed to know this but of course I got happy & whatever. Well, on Friday he asked me to go to Soph Hop w/ him, and how could I refuse? So now he's taking action but...I don't want this to be one of those things that he' s just doing because he's bored or just wants a girlfriend since Raven dumped him. Plus I don't even know why he likes me. I should ask Cheyenne to ask him since I can't because then that would blow her cover. So, if I find out it's a legitimate reason, if & when he asks me out I'll tell him "I have to think about it..."

Ayumu_Kasuga's Xanga

Well...

OMG Today was SO fun

Making my way

This sucks

Friday, December 08, 2006

Friday, November 17, 2006

*Sigh*...

Well...

Ummmm...Halloween dance?

O-tay!

Sigh...